Darkness surrounds a person who defines themselves that way. It is a two part system of give and take where as a person believes it so does it feed them back. Letting go of their failures is not hard nor is changing how one sees themselves. New and different, but not hard. It takes a decision to accept change and allow yourself to have control over your life. The next step is what finalizes the motion by concreting the step in a direction of being free and successful for yourself.
Bad shit happens, how a person frames shit is what defines their life and creates the next scene in said life. To allow moments in past to hold way as ripples in one’s history means they have a shitty spin to their and one’s own story. You are always overcoming bullshit, it is not your fault nor defeating you. That arbitrary outlook is your approach that makes it good or bad and does the same for your future and present. Take the times and exercise your ability to define moments of pain and failure in your life as challenges you overcame. This is not just calling the event a win but takes precise examination and dynamic analysis so to aim yourself better. In my life my family is crazy and a couple tragedies happened, I took their damage and made them lessons to grow from and reasons to be better than their pain would have them. Its escaping a curse and creating one’s future and we’re all free to do it.
A huge step is the move to be free from expectations. Truly being yourself means changing often and letting go of childish notions of a perfect life or the best career. There will always be more in the world than one person can know so getting out there and learning, being open and curious is how one grows and finds their best course in life. Whatever you were planning on doing, what your family expects of you, what sounds right for society, fuck that. You must do what makes you happy and pursue what makes you feel real. The crazier this is or surefire fail doesn’t matter a rat’s ass. The move to accept and try is a healthy step. Always give yourself credit for moving forward and keep making more of those moves.
Removing the people who you believe matter and replacing them with people who believe in you is huge. We are social beings and our loved ones affect how we think and exist. To kill a bad idea, you replace it with a good idea. What that means is that a person is just series of ideas one believes in. My version of one person may be totally different than yours. In action, the more you treat a person like someone who does believe in you, the more they will respond positively. If they lack the capacity then they will exit on their own accord but all you must do is create the circle and social relationship bridges to grow. Not doing this actually hurts others as you restrain them to a particular, lower person in your life. This hurts you and them. Revamp your ability to believe that people believe in you.
How you define yourself is a free move. You get to be as ridiculous and lucky as you want. The thing about existing is that its definition depends on the story teller. Jesus was a terrorist is one of my favorite songs by the Dead Kennedys and it explains in full bloom what I mean. You get to be crazy because everyone is actually crazy to a degree. Pursuing things means more from the determination and its effects than it does by its validity and people accepting it. You get to be whoever the fuck you want to be. Your future depends on you living a life just as you would have it. Nobody else’s standards matter until you make them, you are free.
I advice the start of this by breaking rules. Allow yourself to get in trouble or get yelled at. All that really does is teach you where real limits are. Fear is the biggest deterrent, not the damage. There are stupid rules holding you back all the fucking time and waaaaay more worries holding you back which you have classified as rules. That’s just a human thing and a fucking human thing. Stupid fucking humans. Break the rules you have invented which hold you back, this is only your perception of reality you’re changing and making better.
A big reason for not being yourself is that a person has become afraid and catered to someone else’s believes. This can be seen in being excessively rather than playfully competitive, needy, insecure, or worried. You get to be excited 24/7, you get to decide how you want to feel and nobody else is in charge of that. Many people react to other’s fears by making them, their own. The way to live best is to realize nothing really matters until you decide it does and then picking the important things, not the painful or sad things. Do what inspires you, be the person who would inspire you and whom you wish would walk into the bar.
